I WANT TO LIVE, December 2022
“I’m bored now; let’s just end this and go!” you said.
I understood—
you chose me to slowly die beside you.
“I’ll hide you,” I said.
Don’t hold back, die here, cool and quiet.
But pay no mind to my words, they’re hollow,
for I… I still want to live.
“My best friend is myself!” you said.
I understood
You chose me to witness your loneliness.
“Your soul is full of light, really don’t make such a thing of it,” I said.
It sees best in the dark, and my heart…
my heart shows itself to you most beautifully.
“You can’t turn every little thing into sorrow; it’s not right, it’s unfair to you too!” you said.
I understood
You chose me to keep you alive for the sake of your pride.
“Reverse gears are good; take back that last thing you said,” I told you.
And something in me flung wide open,
My soul stretched so far toward you
That you filled all my corners.
Now my diagnosis shows itself cleary
It is emptiness deficiency